Santa Claws

MOVIE #2,242 • SCORE 4/10 • 12.25.24
SERIES: XMAS 2024 — A 3-DAY "SILENT NIGHT" CELEBRATION

When I was looking for the horror Santa Claws (1996) on Christmas Day last year, I stumbled upon a film with the exact same name. And because A) I'm fond of that sort of thing, and B) I hate myself, here I am: watching a talking animal movie made by The Asylum.

The plot? A single-parent Mom who saw Santa when she was a kid grows up to hate Christmas because nobody believed her that she saw Santa? And her next-door neighbor, who also saw Santa, is still her next-door neighbor as a strange adult living alone, except he’s taken their childhood ‘trauma’ in the other direction and has become super-obsessed with Christmas? Meanwhile the lady’s son wants to celebrate Christmas but she won’t let him and their cat has talking kittens and she won’t let him keep the kittens because they are too expensive so he puts them in a box on Christmas Eve alongside a note asking Santa to take them away and give them a new home but Santa is extremely allergic to cats and so when he opens the box of kittens he goes into a coma and the kittens have to drive his sleigh around the world and deliver all the presents and when the little kid tries to wake up Santa from his coma, he says this…


WHAT.

Santa is also allergic to peanuts and the kid very nearly kills him…


That's not magic at all!

Then Santa grossly sneezes all over the weird neighbor…


Deranged and horrible movie but still better than the original Santa Claws and WORLDS better than Silent Night, Bloody Night 2: Revival. Merry Christmas. I’m giving the visitors to this website coal apparently!

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Tommy leaves his kittens out for Santa to take back to the North Pole, but after a major allergic reaction Santa can't deliver presents anymore, so the kittens have to deliver the rest of the presents to all the boys and girls. It was released on November 4, 2014.